“…through town she glides like a glistening jewel towards a spot where no cars go. There is nothing but grass, trees, sun and sky accompanying her and her bike as she lies down, places the bike on top of herself and frees her breasts from the dress; they are pushed up against the bike’s cold hard steel.”
This Bike Porn Festival at Passing Clouds was brought together by engaged spirits of the east London biking community and the American Bike Smut duo Reverend Phil and Poppy Cox. For three hours all we cared about was Bike Porn and the event escalated to fulfill our wishes through an unbelievable journey starting with innocent games and ending up with men and women enjoying bikes and each other in screened movies gathered from around the world and brought to our field of vision by Bike Smut. Or, how free spirited it ended I don’t know, because I didn’t stay for the afterparty.
A fun race prior to the screenings
Everything about bikes is sexy; the ride, the wind, the sweat, the freedom, the muscles and the anarchy. I had never thought of taking it that far myself, but I can see where it’s coming from. The curiosity towards the event brought together so many people and the upstairs room at Passing Clouds proved to be too small. It was so crowded and hot that towards the end we were panting like dogs.
“Bike Porn is a collection of short erotic films made by inspired cyclists from all over the world. It is creative, clever, funny, and aware! The Bike Porn Film Festival is now in its 5th year and has never been just a single person’s vision, rather, a coalition of the horny work together to bring this synthesis of transportation and sexuality to life.” Bikesmut.com
This is in fact not a male dominated community; a fair amount of female orgasms were played out before our eyes and female masturbation was specifically encouraged and visually experimented in several of the videos. Imagine: A woman wakes up in the morning in her bed next to her partner; he is sleeping. A feeling of excitement comes over her as she is visualizing biking down a country side road; her hair plays in the wind as she is seated firmly on the seat pushing against her crouch. The woman starts caressing her round soft breasts and she approaches him, her hand sliding down under the duvet… He grunts and turns to the side. (This is where the male presenter who can be shown in the introduction yells ‘LOOOOSEER!’)
She gets up, puts on a pretty dress, does her make-up and walks down to the bicycle with bright red smiling lips to set out on a journey without her boring boyfriend; through town she glides like a glistening jewel towards a spot where no cars go. There is nothing but grass, trees, sun and sky accompanying her and her bike as she lies down, places the bike on top of herself and frees her breasts from the dress; they are pushed up against the bike’s cold hard steel. A few minutes of her smiling pleasure as she is giving herself what she deserves, with all the close-ups expected at a Bike Porn Festival, but it never gets ugly or wrong. The woman is loving it and in her hands she has the power to steer the pleasure into sweet ecstasy.
This is all I am allowed to show you (excuse me for screaming into the mic)
In another movie, we saw a woman masturbating with all the energy she could assemble; rattling in bed as if she was having an Epileptic seizure. Right after her pulsating orgasm, her girlfriend comes home with a new DIY tall bike with fabulous features and is enraged to see what her girl had been getting off on: catalogues with shiny, expensively manufactured custom-made bikes. We had seen her creating the tall bike in a garage; welding, joining, grinding and sawing, only to come home and discover this betrayal. She punished her girlfriend thoroughly by tying her arm wrists thoroughly to the tall bike and spanking her.
This is what Bike Smut and The Bike Porn Festival is all about; sexual freedom and, yes, bikes.